I have developed a new hobby. Surprisingly, it is not music related. It is photography. Well, I wouldn't really call it photography. It's taking pictures with my iPhone (because that's the only camera that I happen to have on me at these opportune moments) of signs and advertisements that I find hilarious. Take a look at my budding collection below and you'll probably wonder, like I did, who thought of actually putting this stuff in print.
#1: Warning, Ground May Be Closer Than It Appears
We found this one at Great Wolf Lodge. Is this really necessary? "Dear Guests, please do not walk straight into the ground. Do not dive into the floor. I know this concrete looks deep enough to dive into, but be careful--it's a deceptively shallow 0 feet 0 inches."
#2: Great New Product--But Read the Fine Print
From Costco, it's a brand new product: Genuine Muscle Milk! It's genuine, but note that it "contains no milk." I'm not sure how it can be both genuine and not contain any milk. What's genuine about this?
If it's this easy I'm going to sell "Guaranteed Miracle Cream" (does not guarantee miracles).
#3: Tells It Like It Is
"Man it sure smells bad around here. Oh that's why...we're near the exit for Stinking Creek road."
#4: Not So Secret Hide Out
Batman is starting to show signs of his age. Apparently, he was born / created around 1939-1940 and his hideout, the Bat Cave, was where he kept all of his wonderful toys, and which also protected his secret identity. Now, that he's past retirement age, I guess he couldn't remember how to get back to the cave and had these signs installed on the freeway:
"Bat Cave Exit 49A 1/4 mile"
#5: 100 Year Old Death Metal Band
When we were at Red Rocks a few months ago during a trip to Denver for Megan's brother's wedding (to be blogged about eventually), they had a list of all of the acts who had played there, and I discovered this awesome band name:
"Cremation of Care" with the opening act "The Arrival of the Goddess of Prosperity." I think they were a little ahead of their time.
#6: What The Fish?!
#6: What The Fish?!
During that same Denver trip we also went to the Denver Aquarium and found quite a few goodies.
I like this one.
You can call it the Tire Track Eel OR the Zig-Zag Eel. We couldn't decide what it was really called, so we went ahead with the undersea equivalent of the hyphenated last name after marriage. At least tire tracks and zig-zags bear some resemblance. So, I was a bit puzzled by this one.
"The Lionfish is also known as the turkeyfish, red firefish, peacock fish and butterfly cod."
Later when we went to the zoo I finally understood why this particular fish had the name it did. Have you ever tried to tell the difference between a lion, turkey, peacock or butterfly? They are practically indistinguishable!
This particular fish was a fan of Stephen King's "The Shining."
#7: An Interesting Gift
While we were at the Lion cage at the zoo trying to tell if the feline was actually a peacock, we got a great idea for our sacred and mystical-power-giving Christmas gifts this year:
I'm pretty sure there was another reason that these "gifts" were given secretly.
If you have other hilarious photos, please pass them along for my collection.
